Monday, 23 April 2012

Invisible People

I  am  a  single  person  and  I  have  many  friends, but  at  my   age  most  of   them  are  married  and  busy at  work or  home. The  only   single  people  I  know  are  either  older  than  me  or  younger. My  married  frinds  and their  families  are  very  good but  still  sometimes  I  feel invisible  in  a  crowd - noone   to  kinda  hang  out   with.

My  new  pastor 's  wife ,who  teaches   mathematics  in  a College is  very  gracious and  I  feel  free  to  be in  her  company  in  a large  crowd. Ladies   whose husbands  are  busy   leading  or organizing  a service  or  event sorta   come  together , so  we  can  chat  and  socialize  together  and   meet  friends.

People  think  single  people  have  a  lot  of  freedom and  no  responsibilities. But  that ' s not   altogether  true. I  am  a  care giver  at  heart. After   my   mom  passed  away I  find  it  hard  to  just   take  care  of  myself   only . I  like  cooking for  others,  but  cooking  for  myself  alone  does 't appeal  to  me  very  much. 

Indian  society  is  basically family  oriented.  Single  woemn are   pressurized, patronized   or  pitied. Very few are there to  stand  by  us. On  top  of   that its  a  male  dominated  society  too,  so  its   double  whammy  for  us.

I read  a post  by  Karen Power  on  Her  Blog which  I  found  speaks  for   singes.

Would you pray for your single friends?

 by karenpower

I was made aware of this need this morning at church. Special prayer was given for married couples and the needs of their families. That’s great! Much needed! Yet, I can’t recall one time that there has been prayer for the single adults.

If you’re a single adult, do you sometimes feel invisible?

Seems that others think single adults live the life of luxury. They don’t realize that single adults make up 43% of Americans who are 18 and older (2009). They may not also realize that single’s shoulder ALL the weight and responsibility, if they live alone, of the finances, running daily activities of keeping house, all the details of their lives (groceries, laundry, maintenance, health, other issues) without the benefit of a spouse to help to some degree. They may not realize that if a single adult is sick, no one is there to care for them. Or, if they are stressed, no one is there to for them to lean on or cheer them up … often they may not even have family living close by.

As I sat in the congregation this morning, listening to the prayers for marriages, I wondered just how many in the audience were single. Or how many would love to have someone pray for their specific issues that single adults face daily?

So I’m asking … if you are not single, if you are a pastor or on a church’s staff, would you stop for just a few minutes and think about the single adults in your life and/or church? Would you say a prayer for them?

12 Fertilize my soul:

Felisol said...

Dear Amrita,
I will say a prayer for singles, because I'm familiar with the many burdens singles have to carry.
I was single myself for many years and my only sibling, my baby brother, is single,so is my BiL.

The singles have greater expenses than the married ones, they have to pay rent or interest, electricity, telephone, TV,and in Norway they even pay higher taxes than married ones.
It's simply not fair. Then there's the loneliness,nobody waiting, nobody to come home to.
I was lucky to have generous friends who always invited me, when they had parties or gatherings. I know many who experience "couples only".
I agree to pray for singles, and I also think we should be aware to include singles in all part of the social life. Even more.
I remember when living in my own flat I had to some large renovating.
I sat and didn't dare to ask anybody for help, when six friends popped up and took over the whole work for me.
I'm still grateful thinking when thinking of that special occasion.
Single women need practical help, please do remember!!!



God has a special plan for all His single ladies :)

God Bless!

Mrs. Mac said...

Thank you for sharing the need for praying for single people. Your points are interesting. I've always thought that being unencumbered (single) would open more doors to serve the Lord. But, I'm sure there are drawbacks too .. My oldest son is single (he's just now maturing;) ..and God has recently put it on my heart to once again pray for him to find a helpmate. Love and hugs, C

David C Brown said...

"God maketh the solitary into families."

And the Great High Priest can sympathise for he was once alone.

Zim said...

I'm also single and I study in college. Most my friends from church are older than me and most of them are married and some of them have children and they are after schools and universities. So, it's sometimes difficult, because they sometimes don't understand single people like us. But there are also single people - I worked with them in our children's ministry and it was great experience.
In Poland in large cities like my single people aren't anything strange now. But in villages, especially elder people very often think that single people are homosexual - it is very strong stereotype.
Greetings for You :)

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Single people have a special place in God's heart since their only family is God Himself. They are already married to Christ and await His return to earth to fetch them. Thanks for the inspiring post. God bless you always.


I completely understand what you are saying Amrita. I too struggle with loneliness and not having anyone around who is my age and still single.

In the USA most people expect you to be married after college/university. And if you are not married then the world thinks you should at least be "living" with somebody.

I do believe that as the world gets closer to Christ's return there will be a rise in singleness.

Please don't be discouraged. Fight for your joy and keep on praying for God to give you friends who will stand with you when you grow weary.

Blessings to you my dear sister. God does not abandon His children. He has not forsaken the single Christians.

Amrita said...

Thank you for your kind responses my married and single friends.

I forgot to mention, widowed and divorced people, they too have a difficult time in my country, as anywhere else I suppose.

But there is a kind of loneliuness in marraige too, if yo9ur spouse is not communicative. Many marriages have broken because of it.

John Cowart said...

Hi Amrita,

I hope you realize that you are not invisible in the blog world. You have a real and positive influence here.

John Cowart

Amrita said...

Thank you John. The blog world has really been such a blessing to me. I have such precious friends like you. yours was the first blog I started to read.

I' ve "grown" so much since then.

Anonymous said...


You're beautiful!!

I'm sorry to see that you are feeling invisible. If it's any help, God sees you.

As another single sister in the Lord, I don't feel invisible, only because there are alot of single people in my church.

But anyway, it's good that you talk about this, because it is so true. At least in India, if you are not married, you are looked down upon. In America, I think if your single, you're still looked down upon, but just not as badly.

I love you and I thank you!

Mari said...

Amrita, I think this is a wonderful idea! I would include them in our family prayers. Thank you for reminding us :)